|[ LLXXXXXI ] I'm not afraid of love.
||[Dec. 25th, 2008|11:21 am]
Finally after watching twilight, I have to admit that I was helplessly sucked into the so-called teenage craze over the whole Edward Bella saga. It was not too hard to fall for Edward, at least while watching the movie itself. I mean I couldn't stop asking why are there so many girls swooning over Robert Patt since he looks like a total weirdo and freako but I do actually see some appeals in Edward but NOT Robert. Hehe. He's a really hot vampire.|
So my questions at the end of the movie is whether you would want to have a lover who has supernatural power like Edward: speed, strength, and also that protective nature of his, with the conditions of him being a vampire, and therefore all the complications that follows. Cause for a moment I actually went a little rah rah over how hot Edward is, in the way he stalks and protects Bella as well as fighting for her (literally), but realizing of the fact that he's a vampire....... *shrug*
I think in all relationships there are just complications that are so unique to each couple, and there shouldn't be any that we should feel envious about. Whenever there's something enviable present in a couple, especially when it's material, this same thing might be the complication of the relationship itself that may be known only to the two of them. To illustrate this, take a couple who are both good looking, and perhaps well off financially. So, they have all the reasons in the world for people to talk about and be jealous of considering they have had plenty romantic holidays together around the world, and always look good in the expensive clothes they buy. Little that people know is the fights they have over the most insignificant things like matching of clothes, running out of ideas for presents (since they both own pretty much anything and everything you can think of), etc. It sounds ridiculous, but it may be true.
What I'm saying is that sometimes we are too easily blinded by some outstanding points of other couples, and we work so hard to achieve the same because they seem desirable and attainable. Everyone strives for true love and along the way, may lose belief of its own existence. Sometimes, the more we try to achieve a perfect relationship, the more we tend to fall. We search for that one person who checks every single criteria that we wrote on our 'THE ONE' list and even if he or she doesn't, we always want to make them do so along the way. When we receive love from them, we worship them endlessly and forget about their flaws (partly blinded), but when they make mistakes, we remember every single ugly detail and even exaggerate them.
Yes it is love that is doing this to us, after all we're just human! How could we be the most perfect creature and behave like we're 100% rational? It's not possible, and I personally committed a number of the above. I used to envy many girls and relationships. I envy the many characters in the many movies I watch for making love look so simple and perfect, especially by all the crazily awesome male characters (ugh, how many times do you tell yourself "such men don't exist in the real world"?). I grew up shaping and moulding for the ideal kind of true love I desire to have, and if I have to create a list, it will never end.
When I met Pat, I was like going through my list and checking them, at the same time criticizing on those that he fails to tick. I still went on attempting to make him fit the ideal image I have in my head. I finally learnt to stop. Right now, I am doing a lot of reflections and going through what both of us have, through looking at the many things that we don't have. What we don't have, well obviously, is each other's presence to celebrate this festive season of Christmas. I recall reading one of Pat's sms complaining about how he's starting to dislike Christmas more and more because everything seems to be mocking him such as the lovely couples walking down the road sharing kisses, and all the love songs playing on the radio on repeat, etc. I felt the same too. One thing for sure though, that doesn't make me dislike this year's Christmas, is the fact that I have someone in my heart and knowing that I'm in his. This beats all the physical closeness that we both desire. So Christmas is really not too bad after all, not for me.
I could really ask for nothing more when I got to sit and watch Pat unwrap my present through skype. The reaction on his face…. was priceless. That is also, satisfaction for me. When I look at what we have as of now, each others’ hearts, I’m more than happy.
I’m sure Edward and Bella face numerous of problems in their relationship, but what they have at the moment, the intense love they share for each other will outshine whatever differences in them. I think the best parts of the whole movie, in my opinion, are not the heroic actions of Edward, but rather the way they look into each other’s eyes, I know now what it is.
SO, don’t frown and don’t pout, for it is still a lovely part of the entire year, share it with your loved ones! Spread the love around and feel the warm fuzzy feeling around your heart, like I do! Merry Christmas!!